Worst thing ever

I thought I locked the public bathroom stall door at NR. I guess the lock didn't turn all the way. Why did I go into the handicapped/changing table one? I couldn't even reach for the door when someone swung open the door and saw me doing the business. There was no way I was going to face the woman and her child in the bathroom. So, I waited for them to leave the bathroom. When I got out, I kept running into them throughout the store. I just wanted to die.

I am getting too fat. I feel uncomfortable when I sit. I look so pregnant even though I'm not. Before you dare say I don't look fat, you have to see my tummy first. It's huge! I eat just because... I gotta stop. No more ice cream every night...no more junk food... no more overeating...

AL , GL and Cousin FH

Cute and funny AL

Sweet GL

We bought a house over the weekend. We didn't even put our house on the market yet. yikes!

I feel lonely and sad today. I try to focus on my blessings. However, it's really hard to do that every day. I feel like I have no choice in my life, and I'm stuck. I can try change some things but deep in my heart, I know nothing will be changed. I just have to change the way I view my life. God, help me to accept my life.

Anyways, I've been wearing dresses a lot since the weather's nice. I saw some of my students look at my stomach and whisper. I just wanted to yell at them and say, "it's lard, not a baby!"

GL will be one next month. I think she'll start to walk very soon. so exciting!
AL is doing great too.

We are trying to sell house again this spring. We may move this summer. We'll see what happens.

no more blogging for a while. Life really isn't fair.